7 WAYS CONTENT LETS YOUR CUSTOMER'S CHOOSE YOU - Bohemia Copywriting + Content Studio


How to help your customers choose you.

Did you know thatup to 95% of human behavior happens subconsciously, so we as humans can’t really explain why we do the things we do, even if we believe so. Brain research calls this illusion “user illusion.”

Crazy right?

Customers do not buy from you.

Customers make an emotional decision to choose you.  

It does not matter whether you are a freelancer, creative, coach, small business e0commerce store or a brick and mortar business  – when a customer ‘exchanges’ with you they are choosing to align themselves with you; your brand, your message.

Your customer chooses you – and this choice is made on a very primal and emotional level.  

This article; How to help your customers choose you is NOT about gimmick marketing or persuasion methods, it’s a crash course on how we all (every human) make decisions.

Our aim for this article is that you gain some cool new info about how all of us make decisions and how you can make it super easy for your customer to choose you. 

Here are the 5 steps to helping your customers choose you:

Step 1: Understand The Process Of How Your Customers Think
Step 2. Know Your Why and Communicate It
Step 3: Create the Ultimate Customer Experience
Step 4: Be Aware of What ‘triggers’ your Customers into Action
Step 5: See the Gap between Pain and Pleasure and do Something about it.

Step One in helping your customers choose you:

Understand The Process Of How Your Customers Think

Our brain is an amazing organ and it’s bombarded with thousands of thoughts, messages, impulses and reactions every single minute.

To ‘split the deck’ and delegate the work out it relies on different areas of the brain for different decisions.

When you as a business owner can understand a little more about the way we all think and make decisions then you’re one step closer to understanding how your customers think and feel.

Very basically we have three areas of our brain:

  1. Our central core which is responsible for breathing, sleeping, hunger, our heart beating, basically our central operating system.
  2. Our limbic system (which only exists in mammals) is responsible for memory, emotion, connection, learning, behaviour and reactions.
  3. Our neo-cortex which is responsible for language, thought, rationalisation, interpretation and planning amongst other things.

We all make decisions based on the reaction of our limbic system which is the emotional, decision making part of our brain then our neo-cortex rationalises that decision.

The cool thing about the limbic system is that it does not communicate in words and numbers. Instead it communicates with us in emotions and feelings – probably because it works so damn fast, at 10 Million Bits per second.

The limbic systems gives value, meaning and feeling to all the information our brain is constantly collecting. The limbic system will say “I feel safe and secure. I trust this person. I enjoy this experience”.

Think of the limbic system like the intuitive part of your brain, the inner voice, the gut feelings you experience.

Our neo-cortex on the other hand, which is the newest part of the brain – loves to justify everything.

Our neo-cortex fills in the answers as to why our limbic system would be telling us to feel a certain way.

It works a little slower than the limbic system and has to pick up on ‘markers’ to analytically evaluate why the limbic system is pushing in a certain direction.

Some of the markers could include:

“I feel safe because I see other people have had good results with this brand”
“I feel confident purchasing because there is a seal of approval/money back guarantee/30 day free trial”
“I enjoy this experience because I’ve just gained the information I was searching for”
“I feel loyal to this company/person because they believe what I believe”

So your customer’s neo-cortex will justify your customer’s decision based on the response sent to it by the limbic system.

What does this all mean to you so far?

It means that as a business owner you want to evoke a strong emotional reaction with your customers (speaking to the limbic system) first THEN inspire validation of that decision (speaking to the neo-cortex) with reasons why the decision is correct.  

Step Two in helping your customers choose you: Know Your Why

When you know, explain and live into what you stand for – Your WHY – it’s easier for your customer to know why you matter.

Your ‘why’ is your personal driving force, your beliefs, your mission for why you do what you do.

When a customer can easily understand your WHY they can easily understand the beliefs and values you have in common and the decision to choose you (or not) becomes simple.

Now if you’re thinking how does this all this feeling and intention connect to business and marketing?

I want to let you in on a little secret…

We align ourselves with brands and individuals who help us fulfil a desire. We choose those brands and individuals again and again based on that feeling.

Steven Reiss, Psychology and Psychiatry professor emeritus at the Ohio State University in Ohio, USA conducted a study with over 6,000 people and arrived at the theory that 16 basic human desires fuel most of our decisions.

They include things like:

  • Acceptance
  • Curiosity
  • Love
  • Social contract
  • Accumulation
  • Independence
  • Power
  • Honor and more.

    By knowing your WHY you can help articulate why it is that you do what you do, what your brand stands for and how it will help your customers get closer to fulfilling their desires.


Step Three in helping your customers choose you: Create the Ultimate Customer Experience


“Don’t create a product, create an experience”.

Interestingly, customer experience is one area where a lot of businesses fail to plan.

However when you do – there is a world of loyal, loved up customers waiting for you! If you can create an amazing experience for your customers – one in which you solve a problem, fulfil a desire and let them feel an emotional connection to you – not only will they rave about your brand and share their positive experience but you as a business owner have achieved your goal of helping your customer.


Sometimes business owners get caught up is in the zone of creating products, launching services, being active on social media, pumping content and forgetting to focus some of that energy on creating the ultimate experience for their customers.

“Your website isn’t the center of your universe. Your Facebook page isn’t the center of your universe. Your mobile app isn’t the center of your universe. The customer is the center of your universe.” – Bruce Ernst

What is the ultimate customer experience?

Well basically you want to ensure that every touch point your customer has with you and your company is like a breath of fresh air.

You want to ensure that you turn up for your customer at every moment that matters to them.

You want to rely on smart and strategic systems to help your customer get what they need fast and that you’re engaging with your customers when and how THEY want to connect.

Your ultimate customer experience is based on what’s best for your customers – it’s not about you.  

The magic happens when that gap between the two is as minimal!

A quick example…

If your ideal customers are stay at home Mum bloggers and you schedule a webinar for 4:00pm because that time works for you – for your customers, that’s when the kids are home and they’re in ‘Mum Mode’ so it’s probably not going to work as well for them as say 11:00am that same day.

So schedule it for 11:00am and let them know this is so they can jump on line before any lunch plans they have, in between school drop off and pick up times – let them know you’re thinking of them.

If they take the time to join you on the webinar, in the follow up email wish them luck with the school pick up that afternoon! By taking the extra step and think about your ideal customer and what their world looks like you will create an extra layer to their experience and emotional connection with you.

You want your customer to feel “She just gets me”!


Step Four in helping your customers choose you: Be Aware of what ‘triggers’ your Customers into Action

So what sparks your ideal customer to make a decision?

Biology says we’re still heavily influenced by our herd and our tribe.  

When we see one of our peers experience a positive result, we’re more likely to want the same process to get the same result.

This exists around us constantly…

When a friend tells you how awesome their new hairdresser is and you book in right away.

When your sister tells you about the book she’s reading and you want to read it to. When your partner tells you they’re taking you to the new restaurant around the corner because they saw a review on facebook that said the cocktails were amazing!

It’s called social proof and it’s incredibly important ‘trigger’.

Gareth Goth at Insightsquared.com says: Buyers – and human beings in general – have a herd mentality, opting to move together in large groups. They will naturally be swayed by what a great number of their peers have done. This is why social proof has become such a powerful selling weapon today. Demonstrate to your potential buyer how others have bought and benefited, and they might start to see things from that other herd’s positive perspective as well.”

Apart from social proof, other psychological triggers that may activate your customers into decision mode include:

  • Reciprocity
  • Novelty
  • Storytelling
  • Simplicity
  • Credibility
  • Common goals
  • Curiosity
  • Anticipation
  • Scarcity
  • Celebrity
  • Social Importance
  • Controversy

Coming back to our brains for a moment – all these ‘triggers’ are giving your customers little signposts along the journey which tell them to keep going.

  • If your customer is on your website and the imagery is appealing to them and their values – the brain says keep going this feels good.
  • If they’re reading a blog post that speaks to a current issue they’re facing and how to solve it – the brain says keep going you’re gaining information.
  • If they’re reading an email that is telling a story – the brain says keep going you’re being entertained.  
  • If they’ve just had an awesome meeting with you and they receive a thank you email or text – the brain says keep going you’re appreciated.   
  • If your customer is about to purchase something and they see reviews and write ups from other customers praising the product –  the brain says keep going, others have had great experiences, you will too.
  • If your customer receives the best possible welcome pack to your company or program that lights up their day –  the brain says keep going, I’m important to this person/company and they value me.

This is happening constantly and it’s not random – your brain is evaluating so many pieces to the puzzle based on your personal values, driving factors, success markers, memories (basically everything) and letting you know whether the interaction you’re having is enjoyable, valuable and getting you closer to your goals (or not).

Step Five in helping your customers choose you:  See the Gap between your Customer’s Pain and Pleasure and do Something about it.

Basic rule of business: learn what is causing pain to your customers and create experiences to move them away from that pain.

Know your customers, love your customers, honor your customers.

We know you care about the difference you’re making in the world and that the best place to start is with the difference you can make to the lives of your customers.

However caring about your customers and being clear on their pain and what they need to alleviate that pain can be a tricky puzzle.

A big part of the reason why Bohemia exists is that we were hearing the same story from customers:

“I am really good at what I do, I love working with my customers and I’m passionate about building a strong business.
But I feel stuck in the mud – I don’t know what will help me grow my business, I don’t enjoy pushy salesy tactics,
I’m not a good networker but i want to know more business owners and I’m not sure how to communicate to my customers.”

Reading between the lines we know that our customers desire a couple of things:

  1. Belonging to a tribe of positive business owners who are like them!
  2. Power of knowing how to speak their truth so they never have to present an aggressive, salesy message to their audience.
  3. Connection to their customers because that connection is really to their higher goals.
  4. Confidence so they can communicate their services and offers in a genuine and joyful way.

So it’s our intention to move our customers away from that feeling of helplessness and closer to feeling strong with clarity, alignment and strategy.

We’re creating a community, online courses, in-person workshops and resources on goal setting, planning, strategy and marketing so that our customers (YOU) can move away from their pain and closer to their pleasure, which is a vibrant, thriving business.

And by presenting our beliefs, our reasons WHY we are helping our customers choose us.

You can add even more value to your customers when you put yourself right in their shoes.

Often the solution you’re creating is about helping your customers become a better version of themselves.

The value of your customer’s experience comes from how quickly you can move them from their pain to their pleasure and it’s this value that allows a customer to choose you!

There you have the 5 points that will help your customer choose you.

No matter what industry or what stage of business you’re in right now – these 5 steps will help you to listen in, learn and act based on the needs, wants and desires of your customers.

Remember, it’s not about you – it’s about your customers.

Please let me know in the comments how has this article helped you?


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  1. Very very insightful informative and clear. 👌

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